Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I Love my Job

...I really do, But I have complete fear going back this week after my Miscarriage.

I am a Labour and Delivery Nurse for those who don't know me. I Love my job, best job in the world, but not an easy thing to go back to. I will have been away from my job for over 3 weeks now with the bed rest for 2 weeks and being off for the miscarriage.

I watched delivery videos on you tube, they didn't bother me, I didn't have an insane urge to fly through my computer monitor and strangle the pregnant woman on the other end. I actually cried in happiness for them like I feel at work.

What I am scared for is how I will feel taking care of pregnant women 12 hours a day and listening to their babies hearts beating all of the time. We didn't get the chance to hear ours (just were told it was there) and for that I am sad. We will be insisting on hearing it the next pregnancy, I don't care how early it is.

I go back on Thursday, I am scared, nervous, worried people will think I am crazy if I wimp out while I am there.

So on this note I will provide a few pictures of what I see and do every day on my job, and some of what I think might be going on in my brain when I see/do these things.

Work:







What will be going on in My head:



What I will probably need:

3 comments:

  1. Shannon, wishing you the best of luck as you return to work tomorrow. It was super hard for me to go back to work after my 1st m/c and I worked in the foster care system, which was especially difficult because we'd get calls all the time from county workers needing homes for a baby or child who had been abused. It broke my heart and always made me so angry.

    I'm sure it will be even more challenging for you since you are a L&D nurse. Sending many thoughts your way....

    Remember it does get easier with time.

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  2. Oh...I shudder at the mere thought of this. Just walking NEAR L&D at my hospital freaks me out sometimes. (hugs) and support...hang in there.

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  3. Well I didn't go back to work, I was sick and so was my dog. Hopefully a call in this week or I win the lottery!

    Thanks Helene and Murgdan!

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